Thursday, October 4, 2012
What does it mean to start over? When it comes to a cake, you have to trash the whole burnt mess and start with all new ingredients. Luckily starting fresh in life doesn't have to be so violent (or messy), but it can be. Sometimes we have to lose our lives in order to start over. Jesus said something about that in the Bible, in fact....
For me, starting over wasn't an obvious thing. I didn't even realize it was happening nor did I have that intent. Yet, over the last few weeks I've come to realize that I look at certain things differently. My worldview has shifted ever-so slightly.
I notice it in things as simple as my sleep schedule. Over the last few months I've been going to bed earlier and getting my day started sooner. Is it because I look forward to what tomorrow holds?
I notice it in my attentiveness to my wife. I don't know if she notices, but I'm a little more aware of what is happening for her, although a new church appointment has kept me from investing more time in my marriage.
I notice it in my outlook on issues and, even, moments of "crisis" around me. I think the experiences of a brain tumor, two neuro-surgeries, and a near-death experience in my hospital bed have changed my world in ways I didn't even realize... somehow for the better.
I don't think you will notice the changes I have experienced. I don't think it is in overt ways, necessarily, but it happened all the same. As a pastor, I look around at the world and wonder...is that what faith does? When we begin to see that there is hope and love in this world, does it change us? I think so. We don't always notice the change right away, but when we see the world through the lens of possibility instead of impossibility...when we see that this world is more filled with love than hate...when we recognize that God can give us hope for a brighter tomorrow...I think it changes our world and us a little at a time.
Well, enough rambling for now!